I came across a reel of a teenage boy whose girlfriend was breaking up with him. Then there were a series of clips of him hitting the gym, getting new clothes, and wearing a weird jaw brace to make his jawline sharper. The reel ends with a transformation so dramatic it couldn’t be believed. The teenage boy went from a normal-looking fourteen-year-old with acne to what looked like a 25-year-old Calvin Klein model. It turns out the reel was a commercial for a jaw brace, which is being marketed to our sons.
This is the new world of looksmaxxing and the pressures certain influencers, product sellers, and cultural forces are pushing on our sons. Here’s what looksmaxxing is, why you should be concerned, and the potential problems it poses for our sons.
What is looksmaxxing?
Looksmaxxing is an attempt by males to maximize their appearance and other qualities, to become more attractive. The trend focuses on, but is not limited to, physical looks. It tends to involve young heterosexual men (from their teenage years to their twenties) and originated from the manosphere and incel (involuntary celibate) subculture.
Is looksmaxxing safe?
A lot of it is safe, but not all of it. Much of looksmaxxing involves working out, buying new clothes, and other things that can improve a person’s appearance. However, there are many influencers who go to extreme and dangerous lengths to transform their looks. Not only do they discuss these unsafe methods, but they also give tutorials for their followers. And the number of followers is growing. According to TikTok, the amount of people searching for looksmaxxing techniques grew from 300,000 in February 2026 to 1.9 million in March.
What are the problems with looksmaxxing?
Extreme and Unhealthy Methods
Sometimes people involved in looksmaxxing can engage in extreme lengths to change their faces and bodies, such as taking drugs like steroids and methamphetamines. The influencer, Clavicular, who is well-known for looksmaxxing, recently overdosed on crystal meth. Fortunately, he has recovered. Another teen who says he looks up to Clavicular has been taking steroids for ten months and said he is willing to have a heart attack at age thirty to look better now. Other extremes involve a technique called bonesmashing, which uses a hammer to cause microfractures in the cheeks to help shape the jawline. These extreme and unhealthy methods are strongly discouraged by doctors, who call them ineffective at self-improvement and dangerous.
Insecurity
Looksmaxxing is largely driven by insecurity. It’s a way for young men to try to build self-confidence. Unfortunately, the main premise that is often pushed is that a person’s value is based on how they look. People who maintain that belief are rarely self-assured. A lack of positive attention (or a perceived lack of attention), comparison to others, or their own self-critique, brings them right back to where they started—with a low self-image.
Obsession with Perfection
The focus of looksmaxxing tends to be on a person’s flaws, and so, there’s often an endless pursuit to meet impossible standards. Looksmaxxers can easily become hyperfixated on eliminating perceived imperfections. At best, this can be an incredible waste of time and energy; at worst, it can have a damaging impact on their self-perception and mental health.
Self-Conceit, Arrogance, and Narcissism
These attitudes and conditions have a profound effect on our relationships. When we look down on people, love departs our lives. Replacing it is judgment, selfishness, and contempt. All of those lead to disconnection. The fullness of our lives is directly related to the depth and capacity of our love. Fullness doesn’t mean achievements, but contentment and peace with ourselves and our lives, no matter our circumstances. People full of self-conceit, arrogance, and especially narcissism rarely, if ever, experience contentment and peace because they are only concerned with themselves.
Shallowness
Since there’s such a high value placed on a person’s appearance, other attributes, such as character, intellect, and emotional maturity, are left undeveloped. This can affect their ability to build strong and healthy relationships, leading to long-term dissatisfaction.
Vanity
The Latin root of vanity, vanitas, means empty or lacking in lasting substance. There’s a fragility that develops when people obsess over how they look. It becomes their whole identity. Their self-image depends on the response they get from others. In the short term, they are only as good as the amount of attention they receive that day. In the long term, looks fade, and when they do, so does their identity.
Where should our sons find their identity?
Ultimately, our sons need to find their identities in something that lasts. A rich young man once approached Jesus looking for answers about life (Mark 10:17-22). He was young, wealthy, probably attractive, and, in the midst of the conversation, we also learn he’s a good guy (although that was a self-assessment). He seemed to have everything any of us would want, and many of us think we need to have it to make life work. And yet, he was asking a poor Rabbi what he needed to do to have the good life. Something was missing.
Jesus’ answer was that he should sell everything and follow Him. All of those things he had didn’t amount to much, especially his looks. The thing he was missing was a relationship with God. I’m sure there are many of you who are ambivalent about the role God plays in your daily life, if not all-out opposed. But if God exists and He did create you and me (and our kids), then what He says about life and us is significant. And He says that He created us wonderfully and with great purpose (Ephesians 2:10). When our kids find their identity in the fact that they were created by a God who loves them, they have a solid identity that lasts, not a superficial one based on their looks.
I always wonder what that young man’s life would have looked like if he hadn’t walked away. I believe God calls us to something far more significant than our looks and wealth. Our sons need to understand that. We need to make sure that when they look in the mirror, they see the right things.
Sound off: What are your thoughts on looksmaxxing?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “Have you heard of looksmaxxing? What do you think of it?”