5 Unhealthy Trends Every Dad Should Know About

Ep. 152 – 5 Unhealthy Behaviors Kids Are Doing Today

Every generation has had its unhealthy trends. We had smoking, hitchhiking, not wearing seatbelts—and plenty of other things we probably wouldn’t let our kids do today. But our kids have their own challenges. In this episode of the All Pro Dad Podcast, host Ted Lowe is joined by BJ Foster and Bobby Lewis to talk about some of the unhealthy behaviors they’re seeing and talk through ways dads can help their kids.

WHY THIS MATTERS

Dads need to help kids understand why some things are unhealthy and point them toward better behaviors.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

-Every generation has unhealthy trends. This isn’t about dumping on today’s kids. Our generations had plenty of unhealthy behaviors too.

-Some modern trends are driven by influence and comparison. Influencer culture and looksmaxxing can cause kids to imitate unhealthy behaviors or become overly focused on appearance.

-Avoidance doesn’t make kids stronger. Cancel culture, avoidance, and ghosting can teach kids to escape uncomfortable people, ideas, and conversations instead of learning how to navigate them.

-Kids need healthier alternatives. Instead of simply taking something away, dads can point their kids toward meaningful activities, real-life role models, character development, and healthy relationships.

-Kids need to learn how to handle discomfort. Difficult conversations, disagreement, awkwardness, and failure are part of life. Learning to navigate them builds resilience.

PRACTICAL TIPS FOR DADS

1. Talk with your kids, not at them. Ask what they’re seeing among their peers and online. Find out what they think about these behaviors before immediately telling them what to think.
2. Help them find something worth committing to. Instead of resume stacking, encourage kids to find one or two activities they genuinely care about and stick with them over time.
3. Point them toward real-life role models. Instead of allowing influencers and celebrities to become their primary examples, talk about people you know personally who demonstrate character, integrity, kindness, and other qualities you admire.
4. Focus on character instead of appearance. Instead of obsessing over looks, help kids grow in knowledge, character, social skills, and their ability to take an interest in other people.
5. Teach kids how to disagree. They don’t have to agree with everyone. But learning to sit with someone who sees the world differently—and have a respectful conversation—is an important life skill.
6. Don’t let avoidance become the default. When your child faces an awkward or difficult social situation, help them work through it instead of immediately escaping it. Share your own stories of social failures and uncomfortable conversations.
7. Let kids experience some discomfort. Empathize with your kids when they’re struggling, but don’t always rush in to remove the discomfort. A child who knows what it feels like to be left out may become more aware of someone else who is standing alone.

IMPORTANT EPISODE TIMESTAMPS

[00:00] What Are Some Unhealthy Things Kids Are Doing Today?
The dads acknowledge that every generation has done unhealthy things. The goal with our kids is to help them, not criticize them.

[01:11] Resume Stacking: When Impressive on Paper Means Burned Out in Real Life
Ted explains how kids are loading up on extracurriculars to boost college applications, and BJ points out that colleges can spot it quickly and value long-term commitment over a long list.

[03:16] Influencer Culture and Why Kids Treat Famous People Like Experts
Bobby makes the case that kids assume someone famous must be brilliant on every topic, while BJ reflects on how many influencers are younger and still learning about the world.

[07:15] Looksmaxxing: When Self-Improvement Turns Dangerous
BJ breaks down the trend of young men going to extreme lengths to maximize their appearance and the dangers that presents.

[09:18] The 15-Year-Old Who Said “If I Have a Heart Attack at 30, Oh Well”
Bobby shares the CBS News story of a teen taking steroids to look good now and contrasts it with his own college protein shake mistakes.

[11:14] Cancel Culture: Teaching Kids That Disagreement Isn’t a Reason to Cut Someone Off
Ted explains how canceling has moved from the internet into kids’ real relationships.

[13:35] Why Friction Makes Us Sharper: Moving From “Safe” to “Curious”
BJ says kids need to shift from needing to feel safe to being curious, making the case that we get sharper through friction and not through avoiding it.

[14:37] Avoidance and Ghosting: Why Kids Are Skipping Hard Conversations
Bobby introduces ghosting as a pattern that raises anxiety, and Ted explains how texting helped an entire generation avoid difficult face-to-face conversations.

[16:52] What Dads Can Do Instead: Replace Each Unhealthy Habit With Something Better
The dads walk through healthier alternatives for kids.

[21:15] This Week’s Pro Move: Ask Your Kids What They’ve Seen in Their Friends
Ask your kids about these behaviors and if they see it happening with their peers, and how they feel about them. Then ask them if they have ever engaged in any of these.

SPONSOR:
The All Pro Dad Podcast is proudly brought to you by Family First, a nonprofit dedicated to equipping parents with resources to strengthen their families. Learn more at FamilyFirst.net.