Have you ever tried to prepare dinner with a dull knife? It’s a lot of work. Instead of nice, even slices, that chicken breast will look like a shark pre-chewed it. A dull knife requires more force to cut, which makes it easy to slip and leave you with a nasty cut that takes longer to heal because the wound isn’t as “clean.” Sharp knives are effective. Dull ones are dangerous. I’m not a famous chef, but this is Kitchen 101.
In the same way, the sharper you are, the more effective you’ll be as a dad. What does it mean? Work hard at your dad game and be your best for your kids. That looks different from home to home because no two dads are the same. But we all have the same mission—avoid becoming dull. It’s easy to slip into bad habits, but it’s just as easy to build good ones that leave you sharper than yesterday. Here are 6 dad habits (not bad habits!) to keep yourself sharp.
1. Work out often.
“Easy for you to say, Dan. You’re a former pro athlete.” True, but that doesn’t mean I’m naturally healthy. I, just like you, must exercise constantly to keep my body in good shape. I do it because it improves the odds that I’ll be able to play with my kids for a long time. Not just them, my grandkids too. Too many guys my age are neglecting their bodies. In 2020, fewer than a quarter of adults over 18 met the Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans for both aerobic and muscle-strengthening activities. Don’t be that guy. Move your body daily to stay sharp. Your family will thank you.
2. Read.
In 2023, 46 percent of Americans didn’t read a single book. If you read more than two that year, you’d rank in the top half of U.S. adults. Reading is on the decline, and it’s making us duller. Dads should commit to being lifelong students. Don’t sit back on what you already know. Challenge yourself to learn new things. Even better, challenge yourself to know more about your kids’ favorite subjects than they do. It’ll give you something to talk about with them and bond you over a shared interest. You can be the example your kids desperately need. Reading isn’t always fun for them, but if they see Dad staying sharp and digging into books, maybe they’ll pick up one with you.
3. Date your wife regularly.
This is a rhythm all men should set. Your wife wants quality, uninterrupted time with you. Commit to regular date nights so you two can reconnect away from the kids. Skip the Starbucks drive-thru a few times per month to pay for babysitters if that’s what it takes. Take initiative. Make the movie or dinner reservations yourself. These dates don’t have to be fancy, but they should be frequent. You love your kids, but dating your wife keeps your bond strong and sets an amazing example for both sons and daughters.
4. Stay one season ahead.
It may be OK to let your 10-year-old drive a tractor. And it could be fine to give a responsible first grader a pocketknife. Introducing milestone moments a little earlier than your kids expect you to not only makes you a fun dad but communicates you trust them. Anticipate what’s upcoming for kids. How can you “get there faster?” I’m not trying to get you to wish away childhood, far from it. But when we stay ahead of the kids, we get a front row seat to their maturation. We are there as it happens. Let them cook dinner once per week, give them chances to earn money around the house, or go shopping in a store while you sit in the car.
5. Make “it” a big deal.
Your kids are probably not going to be the best at everything, but dads should celebrate their kids’ passions and interests like they just won the Super Bowl. Whatever “it” is for them—drawing, music, video games—make “it” a big deal to you. This way, the kids know it matters to you too.
My son Madden is very into art. He started making AI comic strips this year to bring his drawings to life. I’m not a big art guy, but I was right there cheering him on as he was creating. If it’s tough for you to get into the things your kids love, I get that. But there is such value in showing your kids that you’re at least trying to understand what they love. Study it. Talk about it. Make their interest a focal point in your home, and when their “it” changes, make a big deal about their new passion as well.
6. Get up early.
Do you like to jog? Read? Take walks? Who says those things can only happen when the sun is up? Whatever your hobby is, get to it early in the day. There’s nothing inherently wrong with doing hobbies in the afternoons, but it will force you to make a tough post-work decision: Do I get “me time” or “them time?” Giving your kids the impression that you care about something else more than them is a dangerous thing. Get your stuff done so you have uninterrupted time with your kids. It will make them feel loved and a big part of your life, because they are.
Sound off: What dad habits have helped you become a better father?
Huddle up with your kids and ask: “What does it mean to start a habit?”