Do you put pressure on yourself to be perfect? Not only is that impossible, but it’s a dangerous goal for dads. In this episode of the All Pro Dad Podcast, host Ted Lowe is joined by BJ Foster and Bobby Lewis to talk about the myth of perfection, navigating our flaws, and being our best for our family. 

Why This Matters

You don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect dad for your kids.

What Do Dads Struggle With The Most?

• Wanting their kids to have a good life
• Aiming to overcome mistakes
• Recognizing that being a dad is a serious job
  
  

Who Feels The Pressure?

In 2018, the American Psychological Association found that “Perfectionism Among (college students) significantly increased since the 1980s.” Nearly a decade later, those students are now adults and likely parents.

This was 8 years ago… which means those same young people who craved perfection in 2018 are likely now parents. Are they striving to be perfect parents, too?

What Makes a Perfect Father?

• Someone who is active, present, and cares about his kids
• Someone who understands being “perfect” adds incredible pressure.
• Someone committed to doing their best for his kids.

If you’re falling into the trap of wanting to be a perfect dad, focus on these instead:

1. 1. Be patient
   2. Be present
2. 3. Be predictable
   4. Be a planner
   5. Be playful

Important Episode Timestamps

00:00 – 03:24 | Why Dads Feel Pressure to Be PerfectThe hosts open by admitting they’ve given up on perfection—and explore why so many dads still feel crushed by it.

03:24 – 05:31 | What Our Own Dads Modeled for Us
Stories about father figures show how growing up without perfection pressure can shape healthier parenting today.

05:31 – 07:19 | Perfectionism Is Increasing—And Parents Are Feeling It
Research from the American Psychological Association reveals rising perfectionism and how it’s now showing up in parenting.

07:19 – 09:50 | Social Media Makes Dads Feel Like Failures
Time-lapse videos of “super dads” building epic projects leave ordinary dads feeling inadequate and behind.

09:50 – 11:36 | Every Dad Brings Something Different to the Table
The hosts remind listeners that what feels ordinary to you may be exactly what your kids need most.

11:36 – 13:53 | How Dad Pressure Becomes Kid Pressure
Unspoken expectations and stress quietly communicate to kids that they’re responsible for dad’s happiness.

13:53 – 15:31 | Your Kids Don’t Want Perfect—They Want Present
A simple truth: kids don’t need a masterpiece dad, they need availability, attention, and connection.

15:31 – 17:20 | Why Perfectionism Makes Dads Defensive
Striving to be flawless leads to justification, anger, and avoidance instead of growth and humility.

17:20 – 23:51 | The Emotional Cost of Perfectionism in Parenting
Perfectionism leaves dads frustrated, discontent, and short-tempered—pushing kids away instead of drawing them close.

23:51 – End | Consistency Beats Perfection Every Time
A dad should strive to be reliable, predictable, and always improving.

APD Pro Move:
Make a list of the times you’ve failed as a dad. Give yourself grace for those moments and stop putting so much pressure on yourself as a dad.

Sponsor:
The All Pro Dad Podcast is proudly brought to you by Family First, a nonprofit dedicated to equipping parents with resources to strengthen their families. Learn more at FamilyFirst.net.