There is nowhere to hide in an NFL huddle. As a young center, I stood shoulder to shoulder with future Hall of Famers like Troy Aikman, Michael Irvin, and Deion Sanders, along with other incredible players. I realized quickly that I had to go all in to stay on the field with those late-90s Dallas Cowboys, winners of multiple Super Bowls that decade. I was strong, but also one of the smallest linemen in the league. Only effort was going to keep me on the roster. If I wasn’t committed on every play, my football days would be numbered.
I am grateful to have spent four years in the NFL. I haven’t worn pads in over two decades, but I’m still as committed as ever to other important things in my life. I’m no longer executing blocks for Emmitt Smith, but I’m more committed than ever to the people who rely on me—my wife, kids, friends, and community. I believe in commitment to what matters most in life, and men who know how to stay committed, who consistently give full effort and don’t back down from challenges, succeed more often. They live with fewer regrets and set a greater example for those around them. You can do that. Honestly, you must do that. Whether you knew it or not, when you became a husband, father, or employee, you signed up for something hard. Don’t back down. Here are 4 places where men must stay committed.
1. In Your Marriage (if You’re Married)
My wife, Ty, and I have been married over 27 years. We’ve been through a lot, and though we’ve had our share of challenges like every couple, we’ve worked through the ups and downs and come out stronger. That’s life. You’re not the same person you were a decade or two ago when you got married. But when you commit to another person, you make the effort to stay close to them—through the struggles, but also the date nights, the late-night talks, and the family trips. Without effort, it’d be easy to grow apart. But when your kids eventually move out of the house, you want to still feel close to the woman you married and not see her as a stranger you’ve just been living with. Committing every day to prioritizing time with your wife, treating her with kindness and respect, and loving her through your words and actions will keep that relationship strong for years to come.
Being a good husband is a commitment you made at the altar. What can you do to show your wife you love her? Start by assuming the best about her instead of jumping to conclusions. Show support instead of contradicting her in front of the kids. And try to put her needs ahead of your own. Staying committed in your marriage means being faithful, of course, but it’s also about making sure she knows you love her just as much today as the day you said, “I do.”
2. In Your Everyday Moments as a Dad
I traveled a lot during my football career, so when I finally left the league for good, I committed to being more present at home. I tried to give each kid my undivided attention each day. Sometimes that was at the dinner table. Sometimes that was in the car ride to my kid’s football practice. Sometimes it was at bedtime when I tucked them in. Staying committed to your role as a dad means never letting them doubt you care. That’s imperative for a father. Your children need to know you love them because it’ll give them the safety and security they need in this world.
Being a committed dad looks different at every stage. When kids are little, commitment may look like closing your laptop and doing a puzzle or LEGOs together. As they get older, they may want to spend time with their friends, but you’re still important to them too. Ask them to watch a movie or play video games. Invite them along when you grab groceries or walk the dog. My kids are young adults now, and I still hang out with them as often as possible. They needed me in kindergarten and still do now. They need to know I’ll answer the phone. Staying committed as a dad starts with being available.
3. In Your Work Life
I’ve done a lot of different jobs. I played professional football and have spent time in real estate, coaching, consulting, ministry, and even keynote speaking. No matter the job, each deserves the same level of commitment. Success doesn’t come by accident. If I cheated reps in the weight room on Wednesday, I wouldn’t be ready on Sundays. If I only called people back when I felt like it, they’d stop trusting me as a pastor. Staying committed at work means showing up when people need you and doing things in private that put you in the best position for success.
Mike Norvell delivered a legendary locker room speech after my alma mater, Florida State, was left out of the 2023 college football playoffs, despite a perfect regular-season record. The coach told his team, “Hard work doesn’t guarantee success. It doesn’t, and it never will. But it absolutely will put you in the best position to achieve it.” Commit to working hard at your job and doing the best you can with the gifts and talents you have. Doing so will not only put you in a better position for success, but it’ll build your confidence and satisfaction in the effort you’ve made.
4. In Your Personal Growth
When I played in the NFL, I didn’t just want to be a good player; I wanted to be great. I was committed to the game and to growing in my role on the team. Commitment meant working hard not just on game days or during the playing season, but after hours and in the off months too. As a husband and father, I’m committed year-round. Just because I’ve been married for a long time and have older kids, it doesn’t mean I’m done. I still want to be a great husband and dad. It looks different than it did twenty-plus years ago, but that just means I need to stay committed to learning how to be the husband and father my family needs me to be at this stage of our lives.
Just because you’re older, have a family, and maybe a career you like, it doesn’t mean you’re done growing as a person. What my wife needs from me is different than when we started 27 years ago, so I need to be committed to growing. What my kids need from me at 24 is different from when they were two years old, so I have to be committed to growing. You can always improve your relationships, your work, and how you use your gifts. You can also commit to trying harder in each of your roles. For me, that means clearing my calendar at the last minute when my kid wants to come home. It means actively listening when my wife shares something that’s been on her mind. And it means figuring out how to better serve my family and even others in my community. Think about what you can do—even if it’s something small—to grow as a man in different ways and aspects of your life. Then, commit to improving a little more each week.
Sound off: On a scale of 1–10, how committed are you as a dad right now?
Huddle up with your kids and ask, “What’s something that you’re committed to?”